Life Lessons for My Sons
Have you made a list of things you want your children to learn from you? There are so many things we want to teach our children, the list seems insurmountable. I’m not talking about learning how to read or how to cook. I mean the life lessons that happen when you’re doing life together. When your child watches how you interact with the waitress or how you volunteer your time. The lessons you want to teach them about relationships, jobs, life, and unconditional love.
Here is my list of Life Lessons. I wrote them specifically for my sons, but they can be for daughters or just people in general. I too am learning and growing everyday. My hope is that as I experience life with my children, I’ll be able to weave in these invaluable lessons.
Life Lessons I Want to Teach My Children
- Give back. Don’t let a day go by without doing something for someone else. It’s as easy as holding the door for someone. It makes them happy and makes you happy too.
- When you’re in your twenties – you’re still learning and growing. You’ll understand in your 30’s.
- Invite the new kid to sit with you on the bus or eat with you at lunch.
- Be creative! You have a unique set of gifts and talents. Everyone needs creative outlet. After all, you grew up with a mom wielding a glue gun and a dad who drew pictures for you.
- Be passionate about your job. You don’t have to keep the same one the rest of your life, but like what you do.
- We all have to do the grunt work sometimes. It doesn’t matter how educated you are or how much money you have.
- Start saving money early.
- Irresponsible actions early in life can alter your ability to get the job you’d like in the future.
- Go on vacation with your family at least once a year. Families need to learn how to vacation with one another. The memories you’ll make and bonds you’ll form are worth every penny.
- Always say “Thank You” and send thank you notes (that you’ve written).
- Live without debt. Money problems ruin marriages, friendships, and jobs.
- Treat the waitress with respect.
- Do not settle for a spouse. Wait. God has just the right one for you and we’ve been praying for her.
- Sex is great – just save it for the one you love!
- Depression is hard to handle. If you struggle with it, get help.
- Having a relationship with God is important. One way to continue to grow and learn is by being active in your church.
- Laugh! It’s the best stress reliever and can act as the glue that holds people together.
- Understanding The Five Love Languages is a simple way to have a healthy relationship with your spouse.
- Be mindful of what you watch on TV or the internet. Too much of a bad thing is bad.
- Everyone needs to have boundaries in their relationships. It’s too easy to get pulled in every direction.
- You don’t need alcohol, drugs, or cigarettes to have a good time.
- The best thing you can do for your children is to love (and respect) your spouse. (from Gram)
- No fish handshakes! Have a firm handshake, it shows your confidence. (from Grandad)
- Work Hard, Play Hard. (advice given to your aunt when she graduated from high school)
- Be careful about engaging in emotional relationships with women who are not your wife.
- Give back to your community. While you’re doing good for others, it really does the most for you!
- Try to use your time wisely. Too much free time is not productive.
- There is no such thing as “happily ever after”. Life, love, and relationships are not like the movies. Neither is sex.
- Lending someone money can ruin a perfectly good relationship and your bank account.
- This will go against our “give it your best all the time” talk – give 90% at work and save 10% for home. Your family deserves some of your best too.
- Wear Sunscreen. Trust me.
- Remember compliments you receive and forget the insults.
- Using good manners and being respectful can help you land your dream job.
- Love unconditionally. This is how you were raised. Nothing you could ever do or say would make me stop loving you.
- Mental health days are good for the soul.
- Choose a spouse that is also your best friend. That will make you happiest in the end.
- Call your mom.
Dear Boys-
Of all the boys in the world, I’m glad God gave me YOU to be my sons!
Looking for some books to support writing your Life Lessons?
Do Your Laundry or Die Alone (click here)
The ABC’s of Adulthood (click here)
The Last Lecture (click here)
My daughter and I were watching the video on YouTube today with Nick Vujicic (the guy that has no arms or legs) (http://youtu.be/yo_24_qTNac). I like what he had to say about never giving up and being thankful in ALL circumstances.
And our family’s favorite verse, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength.”
Love those two verses Heather! Just watched Nick on You Tube too – inspiring!
Loved to read your post and I especially love your last one: Call your mom 😉 Hope my son will do in a few years 😉 Great post!
I know I’m late to the party (I usually am!) but I’m a Mom to three teenage and young 20s sons here, and want to applaud you…. your list is fantastic!
I would add: remember that “Bad company corrupts good character” I Corinthians 15:33
and
Be a man of character and integrity: “A good name is more desirable than great riches; to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.” Proverbs 22:1
Thank you Truly Blessed! I love the verses you added!
I truly love this post and the wisdom it gives children. I have stumbled and tweeted it.
Thank YOU!! Your comment and your extra effort for putting it out to the “public” means the world to me!
Stumbled upon this on Pinterest.
This is a very cool set of words to pass on. 🙂
I feel parents in this day and age seem to have forgotten that their roles spans more than merely funding for the education and material needs of their children. It is in little sharing like these that makes a true parent.
Cheers! :DD
Nicholas.
Wow, Kristen, this is amazing! As a mom of two boys, I feel like you really hit the mark with all of these! Thank you!!
Kristen this is so beautiful. I have two boys of my own. Just entering the teen years now, and I think every point you’ve made is one that I would gladly share with them. I’ve pinned this! Thank you. xo
This is absolutely beautiful, thank you so much for sharing. I have a 5 year old boy and these are all the lessons I would like for him to learn. So beautifully written, thank you again!
Just like you – BEAUTIFUL! 🙂
My Great Grandfather told me when I first got pregnant…”You are NOT having a baby, You are having a young adult that you will want to become a contributing member of society in 18 years. NEVER forget that and you will be a great Mom.” I have always had that in the back of my mind. His words of wisdom are so true!
I love this list. Some of them are great for my daughter as well. 🙂
Wonderful list. Just adding that boys should be vigilant with skin care, too. I’ve seen so many boys with acne problems and I don’t think their mothers stressed enough how important it is to wash your face, even if you’re a boy. And moisturize, too. Skin care is for everyone. 🙂
I really enjoyed reading this list! As a single girl … holding out for a hero (God’s best) :), I can confidently say that this list is not only for the boys! I was reminded about a lot of things that I should try incorporate more often in my life, as well as remembering that the right one is definitely out there! It is such a beautiful list! Quite inspiring. Thank you.
Ros – you are so right! God has someone special just for you!
Great post! Will definitely show my son! Thank you.
Saw this on pinterest. Love it! The comments are enlightening also. Great work, bet you’re a fun mom!
Thanks for commenting Sandi! I’d love to say I’m always a fun mom – but my kids would differ! We have a good time and I’m just doing my best to raise children who will be good contributors to the world.
Just found this on Pinterest and had to comment. LOVE, LOVE this.
Gotta love Pintrest, this is a beautiful post! I’m planning on doing something similar for my son and will definitely have some of these!
I’m also adding: Sometimes you just have to shut up and listen. and There is no right way to live your life so don’t judge people for the way they live theirs.
I love this so much! I have a 20 year old son and I have taught him well – My addition would be to “Respect your elders, use the words Sir and Ma’am no matter what age you are.
My DH is from the south and has displayed this by example, even to this day – and he’s in his 50’s.
You are never too old to say Sir or Ma’am.
I don’t know how I can express my words about the post! Will the lady know that what a supreme gift she has given to all of the kids with her son!! It’s not only a simple advice note of a mother but also an authentic guideline of a complete human being. Thanks for an awesome share.
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My additional advice: It is better to be kind than it is to be right.
I love this quote, not sure where I found it, but it is posted on our refrigerator. “A boy can become a male adult physically and socially, but he isn’t a man until he has become loving, wise and responsible.” :)Thanks for your list! I plan on putting it on the fridge too.
Teach them how to pray, for themselves when they need help, for others, and for people (he or they dont know) and countries (he’s been and never been too). I think it helps them learn to think outside themselves, plus it’s doing something nice/good for someone else 🙂
The advice I gave my two, who now share it with their own, is “The choices we make dictate the life we lead.” Sometimes, what seems like a small decision can affect the rest of your life, so always choose wisely.
In a completely different vein, I think it’s really important the boys learn to sew on buttons, wash dishes, sort laundry, and other ‘life skills’ that so many Moms teach their daughters but not their sons. OTOH, girls need to know how to change a tire, jump start a battery, and change out a faucet washer. Let’s don’t be gender biased about what we teach our kids!
Great list – thanks for sharing! As a mother of boys, I can totally relate.
Loved this post…I would add that we are to raise our sons to be good husbands and fathers. Need to keep that in mind as they are growing up and not do everything for them. If the mom does everything for the sons then the future wife is doomed to have to live up to his “mother”!! Dont raise lazy boys!! And chivalry isnNOT dead!! Teach them to appreciate and respect their mom and sisters…if they don’t do that then they most likely won’t respect their wife. I have two sons and three daughters. My husband and I are about to celebrate 25 years of marriage. We were and are intentional about fostering a friendship between the kids. They REALLY love eachother and are best friends.
Great advice for my young kids who just lost their father unexpectedly. Thank you for publishing your list and comments…
love 🙂 pinning for my little guy!
http://babybakerlove.blogspot.com/2012/07/awkward-awesome.html
I think these are some great tips. I’m also raising 3 boys. It’s a wonderful and overwhelming task to seek to raise them to be kind and godly young men someday. Thankfully, the Lord has blessed them with an awesome daddy who is a wonderful example for them. I would like to comment on #14. Sex doesn’t need to be saved for the one we love but for the one we love enough to pledge our lives to in marriage. (and save it for AFTER the wedding!)
Love this list!! I really love the one about manners. It is rare to see kids these days use please, thank you, your welcome, excuse me. That’s one thing I have instilled in my 2 boys & I always get compliments from other parents that I have such sweet kids.
My husband & I have raised three amazing, Godly sons, and I’ve prayed for their future wives since they were very little boys. I always sang John Lennon’s song “Beautiful Boy” to them. I’ve instilled in them how to treat women, especially the women they will someday marry.This verse is one of my favorites to quote to them. “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her,” Ephesians 5:25
Thanks for these words of wisdom. God bless!
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